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moonkistprincess:

"i was born in the wrong generation" i say as i steal my grandkids hoverboards because fuck you i was promised these years ago

(via jolivet)

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bombing:

dantheman2033:

bombing:

if you’re on the sun then sun dried tomatoes are just tomatoes

Wouldn’t they just be dried tomatoes, because they are still not normal tomatoes

i just googled this and turns out there aren’t any tomatoes on the sun so it looks like we’re both wrong but more importantly you’re wrong

(via carry-on-my-wayward-waffle)

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whiskeydrinking-operating:

This is Chester. When I was in Afghanistan I got a care package from one of those “Adopt a Soldier” programs that lets families send care packages to service men and women who are deployed overseas. Anyway, I got this care package, and it came with the usual stuff: Baby wipes, crackers, peanut butter, the Dad threw in a pack of cigarettes, and there was some jerky. But there was also a little beanie baby gold fish and a hand written note from a 7 year old girl that said  “Dear Soldier, (I wasn’t even mad) I hope you are doing well. I’m sorry you have to miss thanksgiving with your family. This is my friend Chester. He keeps me safe from monsters, but I think you need him more than I do. I hope he keeps you safe from the monsters you’re fighting. Take good care of him for me”.
You bet your ass that little fish was in my pocket every time I went on patrol.

whiskeydrinking-operating:

This is Chester. When I was in Afghanistan I got a care package from one of those “Adopt a Soldier” programs that lets families send care packages to service men and women who are deployed overseas. Anyway, I got this care package, and it came with the usual stuff: Baby wipes, crackers, peanut butter, the Dad threw in a pack of cigarettes, and there was some jerky. But there was also a little beanie baby gold fish and a hand written note from a 7 year old girl that said
“Dear Soldier, (I wasn’t even mad)
I hope you are doing well. I’m sorry you have to miss thanksgiving with your family. This is my friend Chester. He keeps me safe from monsters, but I think you need him more than I do. I hope he keeps you safe from the monsters you’re fighting. Take good care of him for me”.

You bet your ass that little fish was in my pocket every time I went on patrol.

(Source: never-let--it-die, via carry-on-my-wayward-waffle)

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Best of Autocorrect

damonssalvatoree:

lordofthedawn:

rocknrollercoaster:

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I got to “Dad” and had to scroll down and reblog for a break because I laughed so hard I nearly threw up twice.

"Killing her seems a bit harsh"

(via carry-on-my-wayward-waffle)

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jillthompson:

all-that-sheeran:

imeginedragons:

videohall:

These videos blow my mind every time

idk what  i just watched

THIS IS TRIPPY AS FUCK

Did I accidentally have a hallucinogenic lunch? Whoa!!

(via jolivet)

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shego:

shout out to people who have seen you naked but you can still have regular conversations with

(via bnschatzi)

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seducemymindyouidiot:

Bitchy Sherlock is my favorite Sherlock.

(Source: rosetylear, via carry-on-my-wayward-waffle)

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itseasytoremember:

capslockapocalypse:

letmusicsetyoufreee:

frankienathanieljonas:

bubblelumps:

was voldemort a virgin

#did you see him in 5th year? #he wasnt a virgin

Imagine being the chick to do the frick frack with the Dark Lord Voldy. 

TUMBLR DOT COM: WHERE WE CAN DISCUSS HAVING SEX WITH VOLDEMORT BUT WE CAN’T ACTUALLY SAY THE WORD SEX

doing the do with you know who

(via officialtardis)

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randomfandemonium:

Jim Beaver just made the Ice Bucket Challenge haters sit down and shutup
(Link From The Post)
Disclaimer: You will probably cry when you watch the video

randomfandemonium:

Jim Beaver just made the Ice Bucket Challenge haters sit down and shutup

(Link From The Post)

Disclaimer: You will probably cry when you watch the video

(via carry-on-my-wayward-waffle)

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A thing happened on campus

shady-brain-farm:

So my name is Joey White and I’m a very pasty pale British white guy at uni overseas. So I was introducing myself and this guy from Nigeria goes “Hi, I’m Joseph” so I said, “I’m a Joseph too! Joseph White.” Then he looked me in the eye and said in a dead serious tone “I’m Joseph Brown” and we nearly died.

(via carry-on-my-wayward-waffle)